Skittles Make Love Happen
by Hate Me-I Dare You
Summary: Sakura Haruno doesnt care that Ino stole her life but this time shes gone too far! How dare she steal it! sakura then seeks revenge! Her revenge was So Epic it happens to catch the eye of the HOTTEST GANG IN SCHOOL! Warning: CUSSING, maybe lemon AkatxSaku
1. Where are my SKITTLES!

**Me: Yo to all the peeps reading this crap!**

**Sakura: This isn't crap! It's a work of art!**

**Me: You're only saying that because you're the star.......**

**Sakura: Whatever!**

**Me: anyways........... Tobi-Kun go do the disclaimer!**

**Tobi: Hai! ArtGoBoom does not own Naruto or the Akatsuki because if she did Sasuke would die at the hand of Itachi and Itachi wouldn't care. None of the Akatsuki members would die either and they would've completed their goal for world domination. Sakura would've ran aways from Konoha to join Akatsuki too after beating Ino, Hinata, and Karin with a tree.**

**Skittles**

Sakura Haruno couldn't take it anymore! How dare Ino Yamanaka do this to her! She didn't give a dam if she stole my best friend, boyfriend, and life! I remember how she did it very clearly.

_Flashback_

"_I hate you Sakura!" yelled my EX-best friend Hinata._

"_Hinata! I never said that behind your back! Ino's trying to manipulate you! Don't believe her!" I yelled, trying to convince her._

"_It's true Hinata! She was talking about how weird you look and how Naruto would never even glance at you!" said Ino._

"_Fine! If you believe that self-centered BITCH over me then I'm leaving! I can't believe I used to be friends with you!" I screamed._

_The second I said that Hinata broke down crying. Ino leaned down and tried to comfort her, but since she was facing me I saw her ugly, devious smirk. _

_End of Flashback_

Hinata never looked at me the same way ever again. But the time she stole my boyfriend was a little more hurtful.

_Flashback_

_I almost cried the second I saw Sasuke having a hot make-out session with Ino. Sasuke, MY boyfriend! How dare he!_

"_Why Sasuke! I thought you loved ME not HER!" I yelled at him._

"_Sakura oh Sakura. You just couldn't satisfy my wants." he smirked._

"_Yeah Forehead! Beat it!" said Ino._

"_Yes. We would like a little more privacy here. As you can see, we're not quite finished." said Sasuke deviously._

"_I'll never forgive you for this Uchiha! You too Yamanaka!" I screamed with tear stained cheeks._

"_Good, 'cause we'll never ask for it." said Ino with a victorious smirk._

_End of Flashback_

But now Yamanaka went too far! How dare she take it! She will PAY DEARLY! If anything happened to it I swear I'll chop her head off! I don't care if I have to kill her for it! I can't wait for my revenge!

**Cafeteria**

"Ino Yamanaka!" I screamed at the top of my lungs.

"What do you want Forehead?" she said with her posse.

"What does it look like! I'm here to get it back!" I yelled stepping closer.

"Get what back!? Have you finally cracked?" she said with her posse laughing.

" You know what you stole from me! Now give it back!"

I needed it back now! Without it my inner would be unleashed! I would be a rebel! I needed it to control my killing intent! I needed my SKITTLES NOW!!

I walked over to Ino and lifted her up by her collar. "Give it back or DIE!!!" I spat in her face.

"NEVER!" she said fearlessly.

"Fine have it your way." I said while throwing her on the ground. I took a white glove out of nowhere and smacked her silly with it. Then Hinata used her super sharp nails to claw at my wrists. My wrists started to bleed but I ignored it.

Ino got up from the ground while I was distracted by Hinata and smacked me. I caught her hand before it went in contact with my face. "GIVE IT BACK NOW!" I growled.

"Please, just don't hurt me!" she screamed as she reached into her pocket.

"I won't make any promises!" I hissed.

She then handed me back a yellow, see-through case and I quickly opened it and chugged it down.

"**I love skittles and all but why do they have to be the one thing that can lock me inside your mind!" my inner whined inside my head.**

I suddenly turned back into my fake kind sweet self.

"Do you need help getting up Ino-san?" I asked, replacing my scowl with a sweet, caring smile.

"What are you?!" She asked scared.

"What ever do you mean Ino-san?" I asked with a cute voice.

"Well if you don't need me anymore I guess I'll be going." I said.

Skittles always locked my inner rebel inside me. They made me the sweet and caring girl I wish I truly was.

"You'll pay Sakura Haruno!" yelled Ino back at me.

"I'm so sorry Ino-san but I left my wallet at home." I said with my puppy dog eyes that won anyone over.

Sasuke just stared in awe since inner didn't awaken until Ino came so he's never seen me act like this.

"Well, I hope your ribs aren't ALL broken Ino-san. Good-bye Sasuke-san, Hinata-san, and Ino-san I hope you have fun living your **ugly and pathetic **lives!" I said with a little bit of my inner escaping my lips.

Everyone stared in awe at how fast I could change my personality and voice.

I slowly skipped off to eat at that roof since I had no friends.

Who knew I caught the eye of the HOTTEST gang in school with that little fight.

"She's....... interesting." said a man with red hair and hazel eyes.

"She's just like an explosion, yeah...." said a blue eyed blonde in awe.

"Tobi thinks she's pretty!" yelled a handsome boy named Tobi.

The group each looked at each other and nodded their heads. They slowly got up with their lunches and made their way to Sakura.

* * *

**Me: That was so crappy............**

**Hidan: You're right. That was crappy bitch.**

**Me: You only say that 'cause you weren't in it!**

**Hidan: Dam right I wasn't!**

**Me: If you keep cursing at me like that I'm gonna pair you with Kakuzu in this story! I might even make a nice juicy lemon for you two... * smirks ***

**Hidan: Sadistic bitch!**

**Me: Whatever Jashin freak!**

**Hidan: No one talks SHIT about Jashin-sama!**

**Me: No one but ME!**

**Hidan: Whore!**

**Me: Bastard!**

**Hidan: Slut!**

**Me: Grandpa!**

**Hidan: Skank!**

**Me: You do know I control whatever you do in this story, right?**

**Hidan: Is it possible for you to make a lemon for me and Sakura-chan?**

**Me: Yes.**

**Hidan: Can you make me sacrifice the bastard who buried me?**

**Me: Of course! I've never really liked Shikamaru anyways......... He is such a lazy ass!**

**Hiden: When you put it in that fucking way............ I am so dam sorry Art-sama. Please forgive me fucking god of lemons and torcher.**

**Me: I'm a GIRL!**

**Hidan: Fucking sorry, goddess of lemons and torcher! **

**Me: Good boy! Now threaten the readers to review!**

**Hidan: REVIEW OR I'LL HUNT YOUR PATHETIC ASSES DOWN YOU FUCKING HEATHENS!!!!!!!!**

**Me: Good-Bye!**

**Whole Cast: Good-Bye Everyone! See you next time!**


	2. TOBI IS A PERVERTED LOLLIPOP!

**Me: I'm back~~~! Before I begin the disclaimer I would like to thank the people who reviewed the very first day I published it! I'm acctualy amazed that someone really reviewed! I thought my story was super crappy! **

**O.k. , those people are:**

**Deidare**

**Me: I hate Ino too! We both have something great in common! May us Ino haters UNITE!!! ( lol)**

**Ino: Why does everyone hate me?!**

**Me: 'cause you're fat, ugly, and a copy-cat. And many other things that would take eternity to list.**

**SammywithSwagger**

**Me: Thanks for your review! I'm really glad a REAL HUMAN BEING REALLY LIKES MY WORK! I never get praises since my teachers are REAL critics. You Rock non-critic person!!!**

**Haloelizabeth**

**Me: Thank you soooo much! I tried my best to be funny but to tell you the truth I thought it was a sad attempt of humor........ So thanks for your great sense of humor! You rock guy with a good sense of humor!!!!!!!! ( sorry I'm not very creative with nicknames )**

**SeverusHermione**

**Me: Thank-you for being the first reviewer!!!!!! I LUV U!!! ( JOKE! JOKE! I MEAN I BARELEY KNOW YOU BUT THANKS ANYWAY!!) I'll see what I can do about the HidanxSakura lemon. If I can't do the lemon for any reason I promise I'll put LOTS of HidanxSakura moments!**

**Hidan: Thank-you SO FUCKING MUCH SEVERUSHERMIONE! BECAUSE OF YOU I MIGHT GET A LEMON WITH MY SMOKIN' HOT SAKU-CHAN!!!! YOU FUCKING ROCK!!! MAY JASHIN-SAMA BE WITH YOU!!!**

**Me: Get back in the lounge with the rest of the cast! You're not supposed to be here yet! **

***grabs Hidan and throws him in the supply closet..... I mean..... ummmm... employee lounge***

**Me: I thank all the other reviewers too! Tobi, do the disclaimer!**

**Tobi: Hai, TobiBad-sama! TobiIsSoBadAss does not own naruto for reasons still unknown to humanity....**

**Skittles Make Love Happen**

Sakura started climbing up the spiral staircase the school had. She always wondered why the school had a spiral staircase but it was fun to slide down the railing so she didn't really care.

When Sakura finally made it to the top where the door to the roof was she slowly walked in. What she saw on the roof both amazed and scared her.

Amazed because two of the hottest guys in school were cloud watching just like that lazy ass Shikamaru! Scared her because a lollipop man glomped her and is now staddeling her!

"Child molester!" Sakura screamed.

"Why did you just call him a child molester yeah?" asked Deidara.

"Don't try to fool me! You're that dude on YouTube who sings 'Lollipop Man'!" she yelled.

Sasori just watched at the side of Sakura, kneeling beside her while eating a small packet of the rainbow goodness of..................... SKITTLES!!

Sakura quickly kicked Tobi in the ding-dongs and grabbed Sasori's skittles. She gulped them down like she did earlier and smiled sweetly.

"No!!!! Anything but them! Not my SKITTLES!! TAKE MY DUM-DUMS INSTEAD! I HATE DUM-DUMS!!! **( AN: sorry but just so you know I don't hate dum-dums. I love them! It's just that I made Sasori hate them so............. oh, you'll find out! ; ) )**

"I'm so sorry for kicking you Lollipop Man." she said with an apologic look.

" **But you were asking for it! How could you even think of fucking a poor, pure, and innocent girl like me!? Pedaphile! You're just like Orochimaru!" inner made me scream. **Who knew she had such great will-power over MY body?

"But Saku-chan!" Tobi whined "You're chest was just so soft and squishy! It was just like JELLY!"

Sakura just turned beet red and screamed, **"Pervert! Pervert! Pervert!"**

"Wait, how do you know my name! Are you guys stalkers!? Why are you going after such an innocent girl like this when you can just pay Ino a dollar for a kiss!?!?" Sakura asked.

Sakura was too busy yelling for help that she didn't notice that Sasori just snuck up behind her and held her by her waist.

"Shut up! Because of you my skittles are gone!" he yelled

"They were stale......" she said.

"They were what!?' yelled Sasori angrily.

"The skittles, they were stale...."

"You steal them from me, then you critisize them!?" Sasori screamed.

"Pretty much..........." continued Sakura

"Stale food is a work of art, yeah!" said Deidara.

"How the hell is it a work of art?!" asked Sasori, forgetting about Sakura and his skittles.

"Well, stale skittles proves that art isn't eternal. Just like fireworks, food comes and goes, yeah." said Deidara.

"Wrong! Art is eternal! Just like how plastic food can last forever!" argued Sasori.

While Sasori and Deidara were fighting Sakura took that chance to try to get away. Luckily for her, Tobi was too distracted by a butterfly to realize she was leaving.

Just as Sakura thought she was home free she bumped into a hard, muscular chest. When she looked up she blushed without anyone noticing.

Sakura quickly recovered from her shyness and pushed the people aside. As she ran away, the guys watched her, and the perverted people of the group watched her ass.

"Who was that hot chick?" asked hidan, the guy she ran into.

"That's MY girlfriend, yeah!" yelled Deidara angrily.

"No, she's MINE!" yelled Sasori.

"No, she's Tobi's!" yelled Tobi.

"Tobi, do you even know what a girlfriend IS?" asked Zetsu who was behind Hidan.

"Of course! It's a girl who's your friend!" yelled Tobi 'smartly'.

"You're hopeless......." said Zetsu sweat dropping.

"Guys you didn't answer my question! Who's that hot chick! She looks Fucking familier!" yelled Hidan, creating silence.

"Her name is Sakura Haruno. Best known for beating Ino up for stealing her skittles just earlier today. Ino has broken half of her ribs, has a black eye, and is now in Emergency Care." read Itachi boredly from a file.

"Saku-chan!" yelled Hidan out of nowhere.

"How do you know her! ( yeah )" yelled Sasori, Deidara, and Tobi.

**Me: CLIFFHANGER!**

**Hidan: YAY! I'm in this chapter!**

**Me: Ok, I have to cut this AN short since I have to go to school soon.**

**Hidan: Why do you have to go to fucking school!?**

**Me: Because it's 5:40am right now. I just couldn't wait to post this for my fans!**

**Hidan: You don't have any fans stupid....**

**Me: Yes I do you jerk!**

**Hidan: Whatever............**

**Me: Hidan, I really got to get going so do the review thing already.....**

**Hidan: Fucking review.......**

**Me: Do the one we rehersed!**

**Hidan: Fine! ****TobiIsSoBadAss**** wants at least 5 reviews to continue. If you read this and don't review I'll hunt you down and skin you alive! *laughs sadistically***

**Whole Cast: Good-bye! See you next time!**


	3. Hidan is a STALKER!

**Me: I'm SO happy!! *cries tears of joy***

**Hidan: Why the hell are you so dam emotional at this time of day!??!**

**Me: Well for your information I just got over 10 reviews!**

**Hidan: So what!? I've seen hundreds of fucking stories that had hundreds of shitty reviews!**

**Me: Well I'm new here and you wouldn't understand 'cause you're a heartless bastard!**

***runs over to Itachi and cries in his arms***

**Itachi: Who's ass am I kicking babe?**

**Me: Hidan critisized my work! WAHHHH~~~~~~~~~~~~!!!!!!!!!!!!!! **

***Itachi glares at Hidan***

**Hidan: I'm sorry BadAss-sama! **

**Itachi: Sorry won't cut it! * laughs sadistically ***

**Me: * smirks ***

**Hidan: You little bitch! **

**Itachi: What did you just call her!?**

**Hidan: Nothing Uchiha-sama!!**

**Me: Oh, Itachi-niichan! He was so cruel! He called me the B word!**

*** smirks ***

**Itachi: I think you and me need to have a little talk! * drags Hidan into a supply closet and turns on Elmo's World ***

**Hidan: No! Anything but that! Not the fucking gold fish lord! No! NOOOOO!!!!**

**Me: Since Itachi-niis busy torchering Hidan, I'll just start the story now! Tobi, disclaimer please!**

**Tobi: Hai! But I have to finish this quickly 'cause I heard Hidan-sempais watching Tobi's favorite show, Elmo's World! So TobiIsSoBadAss does not own Naruto.**

**Me: Let us begin! Cameras! Lights! Doughnuts! Action!**

**Skittles Make Love Happen Chapter 3**

Sakura was running as fast as she could! Who were those stalkers?! Though, she'll admit, they were pretty hot, but she was not a whore!

"_But, I felt something familiar about that dude we bumped into.... Do you remember anything inner" _Sakura asked her inner in her head.

" **I felt something about him too. You don't think it's..... wait, it couldn't be him! We have to go back!" **inner frantically cried.

"_You're right! But we'll be late for class! I don't want to get detention!" sakura yelled at her inner._

"**Would you rather get a detention slip or miss a chance to see HIM!?" **asked inner.

"O.K. Then, let's go!" yelled Sakura aloud.

**With The Smexy Guys**

"How the hell do you know Sakura (yeah)!" Sasori and Deidara yelled. ( Tobi didn't yell 'cause he's too much of a good boy for that)

"She used to be my girlfriend until....." said Hidan.

"Until what Hidan-sempai?" asked Tobi.

"Until-" Hidan said until he was cut off by Sakura kicking down the door to the roof.

"FUCK YOU STALKER!" Sakura yelled.

"Until I was caught watching her sleep....." Hidan continued.

"And looking through my underwear drawer, snooping around my stuff because he thought I was cheating after I talked to my brother on the phone, and sacrificing my goldfish to his Jashin-sama because it saw me naked!" screamed Sakura.

"Because of you I've been scared of Edward Cullens for months! Your such a vampire wannabe Hidan!" she continued.

"Who knew Hidan was a closet pervert...." mumbled Sasori.

"I fucking heard that Sasori!" said Hidan.

"And it's not my fault she looks sexy sleeping!" continued Hidan.

"What kind of sick fantasies do you have, yeah....." asked Deidara.

"I guess I should start wearing clothes while I sleep........" whispered Sakura

Suddenly Sakura screamed! There was a huge puddle of blood on the floor! Sakura then came up to Sasori and Deidara since they were the ones lying on the floor.

"WAKE THE FUCK UP! I DON'T WANNA BE CHARGED FOR MURDER!" she screamed.

They both then began to stir awake. Then mumbled some perverted things.

"Sakura sleeps naked........and Hidan saw her....... lucky bastard....(yeah)" they both mumbled.

"ALL MEN ARE PERVERTED! THEY'RE ALL EDWARD WANNABES!" she cried.

"Well, all men but Tobi-kun are Edward wannabes!" she yelled as she tackled Tobi in a hug.

"Yay! Tobi is a good boy!" he yelled.

"You're on team Jacob......." said Itachi.

"Hell Ya!" Sakura answered.

"Jacob looks good with Bella but he will soon be MINE!" she yelled.

"But I thought you loved ME (yeah)?!?!" Sasori, Hidan, and Deidara yelled together.

"I'll admit you guys are kinda hot but Jacob is SMEXY!" Sakura said with hearts in her eyes.

"At least we're kinda hot to her......." said Sasori

"I would rather be smexy, yeah......" said Deidara.

"It's O.K. guys! Not everyone can be blessed with an awesome body and god-like face like Jacob.... He just got lucky! At least he shares it with the world!" said Sakura trying to cheer them up.

"WAHHHHH~~~!!!" cried the three sex gods ( Deidara, Sasori, and Hidan ) .

"Don't worry sempais! You don't have to be smexy like Jacob-sempai for Tobi to like you! You can all be fat and ugly and I'll like you all the same! No human man can be as perfect and god-like as Jacob-sempai!" said Tobi while cuddling with a Jacob doll.

"Tobi! No, you can't be GAY! You're way to cute for that! WAHHH~~~" cried Sakura.

"Don't worry Saku-chan! Tobi is NOT gay because then he couldn't be with Saku-chan!" he cried happily.

"Tobi!" Sakura cried in a field of flowers as they ran to eachother.

"Saku-chan!"

"Tobi!"

"Saku-chan!"

"Tobi!"

"Saku-chan!"

"Tobi!"

"Saku-chan!"

"Tobi!"

"Sak-"

"Stop it before we have a Lee and Gai moment!" yelled Itachi.

"Woah, totally out of character Itachi..........." said Sakura as she let go of Tobi.

"He just has a problem with pedophile moments. He hates being reminded of Lee's and Gai's relationship." said Kisame who popped out of nowhere.

"Why (yeah)?!" asked everyone but Tobi.

"He's had a bad experience with the history teacher, Orochimaru." replied Kisame.

"How?" asked Sakura.

"Itachi, tell them." told Kisame.

"Well, it all started when......."

**Me: I'm so sorry it took me so long to update!**

**Hidan: She's been busy pigging out on fucking easter bunnies!**

**Me: No I wasn't! I'd be fat then! I just kept changing this chapter. I was going to make Hidan Sakura's brother, but I'm against incest.**

**Hidan: Fuck incest! Why the hell did you make her hate me bitch!**

**Me: Watch your language Hidan. You don't want me to get Itachi again. Now do you?**

**Hidan: Y-yes, f-f-f-fucking m-m-ma'm.**

**Me: Good! Now, everyone say good-bye!**

**Whole Cast: Good-bye everyone! See you next time!**


	4. Orochimaru is a SUPER MAN WANNABE!

**Me: I'm so sorry it took me so long to update! **

**Hidan: Yeah right! You've been out shopping again! What the hell do you need all this shit for anyways!? * kicks a random shoe on the floor ***

**Me: What! You want me to go running around the house without any clothes?! You're a sick pedophile! You're WAYYYYYY too old for me! You're fucking IMMORTAL!**

**Hidan: I didn't mean it in that fucking way! I'm just saying, you have a WHOLE fucking closet full of fucking clothes! **

**Me: Those clothes are so last month! Anyway, YOU wouldn't understand since you're a fucking guy who's against shopping! I wish you were gay! You'd understand me much more then!**

**Hidan: I'd rather be gay than understand your sick and twisted fucking mind!**

**Me: My mind isn't that twisted...... Well, not as twisted as your mind! **

**Hidan: I'm a priest, so that means my mind is fucking pure and innocent you heathen!**

**Me: So.............. you're a virgin? I mean, priests are supposed to be virgins, right?**

**Hidan: I didn't say I was a fucking virgin! And IF I was, and I'm saying IF, it's not like you aren't a fucking virgin too!**

**Me: Awwww....... Poor Hidan! You've never gotten laid! I mean you've been alive longer than vampires. And it's O.K. For me to be a virgin, I mean I'm only 14 ½!**

**Hidan: * cries manly tears * There's nothing wrong with being a fucking virgin!**

**Me: I'm so sorry Hidan-kun! Please don't cry! I'm so sorry! It's positively normal for a man your age to be a virgin!**

**Hidan: You'll never fucking understand what it's like to be a virgin at this fucking age! I want my fucking mommy back!**

**Me: Ummmm........ You kinda killed your mom......**

**Hidan: WAHHH~~~!!!!! No one in this shitty world understands me! **

**Me: It's O.K. Hidan! I'm sure Edward Cullens is a virgin too! He's immortal you know!**

**Hidan: Why must the only person that's fucking like me be that PRETTY BOY! WAHHH~~!!!**

**Me: * pats Hidan on back * It's O.K. , it's O.K.......... Just let it all out.**

**Voice Inside My Head: What a cry baby....**

**Me: Shut up! It's perfectly normal for a grown man to cry for his mommy!**

**Hidan: W-W-Who a-are y-y-you f-f-f-fucking t-talking to?**

**Me: It's nothing Hidan..... Just go back to your crying...**

**Hidan: O.K..... * cries, sobs, and anything else that involves water coming out of your eyes ***

**Me: Tobi, disclaimer please!**

**Tobi: Hai! TobiIsSoBadAss does not own Naruto because if she did she would make Hidan a sissy and his fan girls wouldn't approve of it.**

**Me: You know it's weird, we started out talking about shopping, then ended up talking about Hidan's virginity.....**

**Sakura: That is kinda weird....**

**Me: Where did you come from!**

**Sakura: Nobody knows....**

**Me: O.K then..... NOW ONWARD WITH THE STORY!**

**Hidan: What about me!?**

**Me: You can go cut yourself in the emo corner if you want.......**

**Hidan: Hell Ya!**

**Me: Now, BEGIN!**

**Tobi: Should we do a recap first BadAss-sama?**

**Me: That's probably a good idea!**

_Recap:_

"_Tobi!" Sakura cried in a field of flowers as they ran to eachother._

"_Saku-chan!" _

"_Tobi!"_

"_Saku-chan!"_

"_Tobi!" _

"_Saku-chan!"_

"_Tobi!"_

"_Saku-chan!"_

"_Stop it before we have a Lee and Gai moment!" _

"_Woah...... Totally out of character Itachi........" Sakura said as she let go of Tobi._

"_He just has a problem with pedophile moments, so he hates being reminded of Lee's and Gai's relationship." said Kisame popping out of nowhere._

"_Why (yeah)?!" asked everyone but Tobi._

"_He's had a bad experience with the history teacher, Orochimaru." replied Kisame_

"_How?" asked Sakura._

"_Itachi, tell them." told Kisame._

"_Well, it all started when........"_

_End of Recap_

**Skittles Make Love Happen**

**Chapter 4**

"Well it all started when I moved here and attracted a lot of girls' attention." Itachi explained.

"What does that have to do with anything, yeah?" asked Deidara

"Well, the rest is too painful for me to say so I'll let Kisame f-finish i-i-it." said Itachi all teary eyed.

"O.K. Itachi." said Kisame.

"You see, some guys got jelouse and decided to pull a prank on him. Itachi never knew they would go this far. It was never meant to happen! The guys just wanted to teach him a lesson, but he got more than he deserved." said Kisame while shivering.

"Then what happened Kisame-sempai?" asked a scared little Tobi.

"They invited Itachi to their little gang, but with one condition...." Kisame started.

"What happened to poor Weasel-kun!?" asked Sakura.

"He had to play 7 minutes in heaven with Orochimaru........." Kisame finished.

"AHHHHHHHHH (YEAH)!!!!!!!!!!!" screamed everyone, but Itachi since he was too busy talking to himself in the EMO CORNER and Sakura since she had a question for him.

"So....... Is Itachi still a virgin?" asked Sakura.

"What do you mean?" askes Sasori.

"Well, he had to play 7 minutes in heaven, so he can't be a virgin!" she accused.

"Why wouldn't he be a virgin after witnessing Orochimaru's SICK imitation of Super Man and role playing as Mary Jane?" asked Kisame.

**(** **AUTHER'S NOTE: SORRY IF I GOT SUPER MAN'S GIRLFRIEND WRONG! I JUST FORGOT WHAT HER NAME WAS AND IS TOO MUCH OF A LAZYASS TO LOOK IT UP SO YOUR EITHER O.K. WITH IT OR NOT 'CAUSE I DON'T REALLY CARE RIGHT NOW. NOW, BACK TO THE STORY! )**

"Oh........ So that's what happened in the closet!" Sakura said.

"What do you think fucking happened?" asked Hidan.

"Oh nothing........ But wait, how is Orochimaru in a Super Man suit scary?" asked Sakura.

"Ya, how IS it scary, yeah?" asked Deidara.

"How would you feel if a pedophile made you roleplay as his girlfriend while he was in his underwear!?" yelled/asked Kisame.

"Wait, did Itachi have to wear a dress?" asked Sakura.

"Yes..... With a skirt too!" answered Kisame.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH (YEAH)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" yelled everyone....... again.

"Poor Weasel-kun!" squeeled Sakura as she patted him on the back.

"Don't worry I feel your pain! I've been molested before..." she said.

"WHAT (YEAH)!" yelled Deidara, Sasori, and Hidan.

"Who molested you Sakura?!" asked the guys whos names are right above this sentence.

"Haven't you guys been listening to me when I was ranting on about Hidan!?" she asked.

"He's molested you Saku-chan? What does molest mean? Tobi wants to know!" said, well, Tobi.

"I'll tell you when you're older, O.K. Honey?" said Sakura.

"O.K. Sweetie!" Tobi replied.

Since Tobi and Sakura were too busy thinking of cute names for each other they didn't notice Hidan being dragged by Sasori and Deidara to the supply closet and didn't hear the screaming from the closet.

**In The Supply Closet**

"NOOOOOO!!!!! WHY BARNEY WHY!!!!!! YOU WERE MY HERO!!!!" screamed Hidan.

**( AUTHER'S NOTE: JUST SO YOU KNOW, HIDAN WAS A MAMA'S BOY WHEN HE WAS YOUNGER AND HE ALWAYS SANG THE BARNEY SONG TO HER SO BARNEY BECAME HIS HERO FOR CREATING THE SONG. NOW, ON WITH THE STORY! )**

Hidan was tied to a chair and was forced to watch a fan made video that showed Barney and Elmo making love to each other.

"This is fun, yeah." said Deidara.

"I know." replied Sasori.

**Me: I already have chapter 5! I just need 5 reviews! I don't care which chapter it's from, I just want fucking reviews!**

**Hidan: I have gotten over what you said to me earlier. * opens up arms waiting for a hug ***

**Me: WTF! Hidan has gone SOFT! You actualy WANT to HUG!?!?!?**

**Hidan: I HAVEN'T GONE SOFT YOU FUCKING BITCH! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU! ARE YOU RETARDED OR SOMETHING!? I AM THE AWESOME HIDAN WOULD NEVER, AND I MEAN NEVER, GO ANYWHERE CLOSE TO FUCKING SOFT!**

**Me: YAY! MY FOUL-MOUTHED, JASHIN LOVING, AND JERKY HIDAN IS BACK! I never liked the soft you! * tackles in bear hug ***

**Hidan: GET OFF ME YOU DAM BITCH!**

**Me: It really IS you!**

**Hidan: Kids, please don't try this at home, unless you have annoying fan girls that always cling to you. * grabs a wrench out of nowhere and tries to pry me off***

**Me: OWWW!!! YOU FUCKING CUT MY ARM YOU HEATHEN!**

**Hidan: NOT MY FUCKING FAULT! IT'S YOUR FAULT FOR HUGGING ME!**

**Me: Let's just get this over with!**

**Hidan: FUCKING FINE!**

**Me: FUCKING FINE TO YOU TOO! SAY GOOD-BYE EVERYONE! AND ITACHI, THREATEN THE REVIEWERS SINCE HIDAN HERE IS A BIG JERKY FACE!**

**Itachi: Hn. Review or die.**

**Whole Cast: Good-bye everyone! See you all next time!**


	5. Everyone is GAY but TOBI!

**Me: Hn.**

**Itachi: Hn.**

**Me: Hn.**

**Itachi: Hn.**

**Tobi: Where's Hidan-sempai? You always do the disclaimer with him.**

**Me: Hn. We're in a fight so I'm hanging out with Itachi now.**

**Tobi: Poor Hidan-sempai! He's been replaced! **

**Itachi: Hn. I'm better than him anyways.**

**Tobi: Don't you miss him BadAss-sama?**

**Me: Hn. No.**

**Tobi: But you two were best friends! Remember all the fun you two used to have?**

**Me: Hn.**

**Flashback To My 10th Birthday:**

**Hidan: Whore!**

**Me: Grandpa!**

**Hidan: Skank!**

**Me: Bastard!**

**Hidan: Wo-MAN!**

**Me: Man-whore!**

**Hidan: Happy Birthday!**

**Me: Thank you!**

**Hidan: I bought you a knife!**

**Me: You're so sweet!**

**End of Flashback**

**Me: * teary eyed ***

**Tobi: See! Tobi told you! * points finger at Me ***

**Me: Hn. I guess you're right. **

**Tobi: What are you gonna do now BadAss-sama?**

**Me: * sobs * I WANT MY HIDAN BACK!!! **

**Itachi: Hn. What about me?**

**Me: You're a meanie! You're supposed to comfort a girl when she's crying! * throws Itachi out of a window***

**Itachi: Hn. * lands on a cat * Ow.**

**Me: Where's my Hidan!**

**Hidan: * kicks down door * I'm right here bitch!**

**Me: * tackles Hidan in a hug * You came back!**

**Hidan: I know! * grins ***

**Me: How could I go in public without you!**

**Hidan: You couldn't!**

**Me: I know!**

**Hidan: Where's that Itachi bastard?**

**Me: * points out of window ***

**Hidan: You did learn from me! * pats my head ***

**Me: * grins * Tobi, disclaimer please!**

**Tobi: Hai! TobiIsSoBadAss does not own Naruto because if she did Saku-chan would be the Akatsuki's secret leader!**

**Me: Now, let us begin this master piece!**

Skittles Make Love Happen

Chapter 5

"Hey, where did Deidara, Sasori, and Hidan go?" asked Sakura after she ran out of cute nicknames to say.

Itachi then stopped staring at the wall and pointed to the supply closet.

"OMG! They're GAY! That's just a waste of hotness....." she said dissapointed.

Sasori's super hearing was able to catch that last sentence. He always KNEW when a hot girl called him hot or gay. He needed to whenever he hung out with the feminim Deidara.

"We HAVE to go back to Sakura! NOW!" Sasori yelled.

"Why, yeah?" asked Deidara.

"Just do it!" he replied sharply.

"What about fucking me!?!?" Hidan yelled but quickly shut his mouth after he realized what he just said sounded really wrong.

"That just sounded wrong, yeah......." said Deidara, highly disturbed.

"I'm fucking sorry! It's just that I'm tied to a fucking chair and I fucking can't think straight! FUCK MY FUCKING HABBIT OF SAYING FUCK AT THE FUCKING WRONG TIME IN THE FUCKING WRONG PLACE!" Hidan yelled like a maniac.

"I think we should go now....." said Sasori.

"You're probably right, yeah....." whispered Deidara.

So that's what they did and Hidan lived happily ever after in that closet yelling curse words to himself! KIDDING! Hidan will appear next chapter again and will receive a bigger role. And when I say bigger I mean bigger than something BIG! Now back to Sasori and Deidara.

"WE'RE NOT GAY (YEAH)!" Sasori and Deidara yelled at the same time.

"Oh, they're in the denile stage....... Well, it's O.K guys! We can get through this! No one needs to cry! It's O.K for two hot men to make love to each other!" Sakura said while patting their backs and giving them an 'inspiring' lecture about famous people who were gay too.

"Did Ricky Martin stop dancing when he found out he was gay? Did Micheal Jackson kill himself after he found out he was intrested in little boys? NO! MJ just went off and molested a little boy! And let me tell you............" Sakura went on with her 'little' lecture.

"Please Sakura, just belive us. We are telling the truth! We're not gay!" said Sasori.

"I'm not sure.........." said Sakura un-surely.

"Sasori's right! Tobi has been in Sasori-sempai's house before and it's FULL of pictures and posters of women! They're really pretty, but not as pretty as you Saku-chan!" yelled Tobi in a childish tone.

"Ahhhhhhh! Tobi, you're so CUTE! And because of that I believe you Sasori! But I never knew you were a pervert....... Well, I never knew you until a few hours ago so I guess- WAIT! If it's been two hours, that means I missed TWO WHOLE PERIODS! I gotta run before the last one!" Sakura said quickly as she ran off into the school.

"WAIT FOR US SAKU-CHAN (YEAH)!" yelled Sasori, Deidara, and Tobi.

Yet, unknown to the boys, Itachi hasn't taken his eyes off Sakura's ass for almost the whole time she was there.

"I guess I have some competition for your love Sakura......." Itachi whispered.

**Me: Sorry I haven't updated in a while! I decided that I will always update on either Friday, Saturday, or Sunday!**

**Hidan: I'M NOT GAY!**

**Me: Of course you aren't..... Anyways, I gotta make this quick since I have to go take a bath since I just came back from a vollyball game. Now do your fucking thing cast!**

**Whole Cast: Good-bye everyone! See you next time!**


	6. Hidan is a JAMES BOND WANNABE!

**Me: I'm sorry I haven't updated in a while! I broke my arm so it has been pretty hard....... **

**Hidan: YOU DIDN'T FUCKING BREAK YOUR FUCKING ARM! YOU JUST TWISTED YOUR FUCKING WRIST!**

**Me: WHAT THE FUCK IS THE DIFFERENCE?!**

**Hidan: THERE'S A BIG FUCKING DIFFERENCE!**

**Me: AT LEAST I DON'T EAT DOLPHINS!**

**Hidan: THAT WAS ONE TIME! I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST A BIG FUCKING FISH!**

**Me: Fuck you...........**

**Hidan: FUCK YOU TOO!**

**Me: FUCK YOU INFINITY! HA, I WIN!**

**Hidan: Dam bitch.......**

**Me: Now, ON WITH THE STORY! Tobi, disclaimer please!**

**Tobi: Hai! TobiIsSoBadAss does not own Naruto because if she did there would be a StarBucks store in every hidden village. **

**Me: Hidan, pull up the curtain!**

**Hidan: Whatever bitch..... * pulls on a rope that lifts up the curtains to the stage ***

**Skittles Make Love Happen**

**Chapter 6**

**In Sakura's class**

"Now, that is the history of 2+2. Anyone have any ques-" Kakashi started before he was cut off by Sakura kicking the class door down all bad ass like.

"Sorry I'm late Kakashi-sensai! I was just walking down the hall when I saw a guy dragging a sack into the supply closet. I thought he was a murderur so I called the police and then there was this BIG case! I felt just like I was in the show C.S.I.! It turned out it was just the janitor carrying around a garbage bag! Amazing, isn't it? Now if you'll excuse me, I'll just go take my seat now!" Sakura said nervously.

"Yes, yes it is quite amazing...." Kakashi said knowingly.

Suddenly, the door was kicked down AGAIN! Don't ask me how that's possible but let's just say they have special grow-able doors there.

The person who kicked down the door was a SUPER hot red-head with bored hazel eyes that made him look like he's on crack.

The person who walked in after him was a feminim man with silky blonde hair and ocean blue eyes. Some people would mistake him for a woman but let me tell you, he's ALL man!

The last person who followed behind the other two boys was a super cute boy with a swirly orange mask that resembled a lollipop.

"Who are you? You're not in this class." said Kakashi not really caring.

"But I see you have three extra seats. Maybe we can replace the students who sat there?" asked Sasori.

"I'm sorry but we don't have any extra sea-" Kakashi started.

Sasori was galring at the boys who were sitting closest to Sakura and after a few minutes of his death glare they just disintergrated and turned to dust.

"I guess we have some seats now, yeah." said Deidara happily.

" I guess you do." said Kakashi amused.

Tobi sat in the seat right behind Sakura while Deidara sat on her left side and Sasori sat on her right.

Deidara got bored while Kakashi gave his lecture about how smoking is bad and started writing Sakura a note and passed it to her.

When Sakura read it it said:

_Hey Saku-chan, wanna ditch class, yeah?_

Sakura just burst out laughing! He even says 'yeah' in his notes! I know that most people wouldn't find that really funny but Sakura was mentally unstable.

"Is something wrong Miss. Haruno?" asked Kakashi.

"Nothing you need to know about." Sakura said now very serious.

"O.K. Then..... Now, as I was saying......" Kakashi started.

Sakura then got another note from Deidara and it read:

_So is that a 'yes' or a 'no', yeah?_

Sakura then started laughing like a phyco serial killer.

"Are you sure nothing is wrong Miss. Haruno?" asked the always interupted Kakashi.

Sakura then stopped laughing and said, " It's nothing that concerns you."

"Very well then..." Kakashi said confused.

Suddenly, James Bond crashed through a window in the back row and handed Sakura a bouquet of red roses.

"That was just weird...." Sakura whispered to herself.

"**At least James Bond is hot...." **Inner told Sakura inside her head.

"Yeah, but he's old..." Sakura replied to inner.

"Sakura, I've watched you afar for quite some time now...." said James Bond in a sexy british accent.

Sakura just kept staring at his slicked back hair.

"You know, you kind of remind me of someone....." Sakura said.

"W-who would t-that b-be p-p-princess?" asked the now nervous ' James Bond'.

"Now I remember! You're really Hidan, aren't you!?" screamed Sakura.

Sakura then touched his hair and it left a silver dot of his real hair color.

"YOU ARE HIM! YOU'RE SUCH A JAMES BOND WANNABE!" screamed a freaked out Sakura.

"Sakura, I can explain!" yelled Hidan.

"This is sounding more and more like a soap opra than a romantic comedy...." said Sasori.

"You're right Sasori-san! Tobi will fix this because he is a good boy!" said Tobi childishly.

"Saku-chan! Tobi want ice cream! Will you come with Tobi? Tobi don't want to go alone!" whined Tobi.

"Of course Tobi! Anything for someone as cute as you!" said Sakura as she left Hidan who was kneeling right in front of her.

Kakashi just watched the whole scene not really caring if Tobi and Sakura ditched class for ice cream.

"Woah, Hidan! You just lost Saku-chan to Tobi! That's gotta hurt!" yelled a random boy who was later found in a dumpster dead for an unknkown reason.

That was how Sakura's and the Akatsuki's first day together went, little did they know there would be much more to come. Much more exciting days........

**Me: That was it!**

**Hidan: I FUCKING HATED IT!**

**Me: Your just mad 'cause you're a James Bond wannabe!**

**Hidan: Whatever bitch!**

**Me: Anyways........ I gotta go take a shower 'cause I'm tired and wanna take a nap, so Hidan, threaten everyone!**

**Hidan: Fine! Review or I will kill you slowly and painfully using your own kindney to sufficate you!**

**Me: How creative! Now, everyone say good-bye!**

**Whole Cast: Good-bye! See you all next time!**


	7. Itachi is DR SUESS!

**(Author's Note In The Author's Note: I'M SO SORRY BUT I HAD TO REPLACE THIS TO EDIT! DON'T WORRY THOUGH! I HAD GOOD REASON! I FORGOT TO MAKE TOBI MENTION KISAME-KUN! I'M SO SORRY KISAME! I PROMISE THAT YOU WILL GET LOTS OF ACTION WITH SAKU-CHAN IN THE NEXT CHAPTER! ( NON-PERVERTED, Well..... MAYBE A LITTLE PERVERTED) AGAIN, I'M SORRY!)**

**Me: I put up a poll on my page for you to pick the pairing for this story and so far Hidan is in the lead with Tobi-kun, Deidara, Itachi, and Sasori trailing close beside him!**

**Hidan: FUCK YA! BEING A FUCKING JAMES BOND WANNABE IS SO FUCKING AWESOME!**

**Me: Okay..... Anyways, Madara-kun is showing up in this chapter! YAY! He will sweep Sakura off her feet with his major hot body! **

**Hidan: I THOUGHT I WON THE FUCKING POLL!**

**Me: Nope! It's still fucking on! PLEASE VISIT MY PAGE TO VOTE AFTER YOU READ THIS!**

**Hidan: Bitch......**

**Me: Don't worry Hidan-chan! Not everyone can be as hot as Madara-kun! Uchihas are just sexy by nature! Well.... except Sasuke.**

**Hidan: Don't you mean Sas-GAY!**

**Me: HAHAHAHA!!!! GO SASUKE HATERS/BASHERS!**

**Hidan: FUCK YEAH!**

**Me: Anyways, Tobi-kun, please do the disclaimer!**

**'Tobi': Fine.... TobiIsSoBadAss does not own Naruto because if she did the company would go bankrupt in a week with all the stupid little toys she buys with it's money which would be better spent on world domination......**

**Me: Tobi would NEVER disrespect me by calling be stupid! WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?!?**

**???: You're very stupid for a 14 year old. You have just mentioned me in your previous conversation. You referred to my body as 'majorly hot'.**

**Me: Madara-kun!**

**Madara: I believe so.**

**Me: * squeels like a fangirl * OMG! You're so hot when your talk like James Bond in that british accent!**

**Madara: Yes my dear, I know.**

**Me: Since you readers at home are probably getting tired of me acting like a girl I'm just going to start the story. You can go put on your man-make-up in the bathroom Madara-kun.**

**Madara: Why thank-you my dear author. I'll be off now. Call me when it's my time to show up.**

**Hidan: What a fucking pussy......**

**Me: Don't talk about him like that!**

**Hidan: HE PUTS ON MAN-MAKE-UP FOR JASHIN'S SAKE!**

**Me: Lots of men wear girl things! Like you with your hair spray, frizz protector, straightening iron, hair drier, and of course your hair gel!**

**Hidan: That's fucking different!**

**Me: How?**

**Hidan: I use hair care products, NOT make-up!**

**Me: Whatever! You should be happy he's not a sexist who hates it when other genders wear make-up! Unlike you! You should be more like Madara with his make-up and Gaara-kun with his man-scarra and guy-liner!**

**Hidan: FUCK OFF!**

**Me: Since this fight may take a while I'll just start the story.**

_-Skittles Make Love Happen-Skittles Make Love Happen-Skittle Make Love Happen-Skittles Make Lov-_

**Skittles Make Love Happen**

**Chapter 7**

**After School**

"Saku-chan! Wait for Tobi at the gate! Tobi wants to go get the other members!" yelled Tobi.

"Ok! I'll wait for you Tobi-kun! Just hurry up 'cause I really want to meet the other Akatsuki members!" yelled Sakura back.

So Tobi ran off into the school knocking down a watermelon cart that just happened to be in the school hallway. Thus making him trip over it and land right on top of his Deidara-sempai who was right next to the cart.

"Deidara-sempai! Do you know where everyone is? Saku-chan wants to meet the others!" said Tobi.

"GET THE FUCK OFF ME TOBI!" yelled the squished blonde.

"Little brother, what are you doing with Deidara-san?" asked a hot british voice.

**(Author's Note: I know Madara really doesn't have a british accent in the show but don't you think he would sound hot with a deep british accent? Thought so! Now just use your imagination on how his voice sounds. I don't give a fuck how you imagine it! Just deal with it! Bye bye! Back to the story!)**

"Oh, hi big brother! Tobi fell and hurt himself! WAHHH~~~!" yelled Tobi jumping off Deidara after he noticed the teeny scratch on his hand he got from Deidara's hair clips.

**(WARNING: SMALL YAOI/INCEST PART HERE! DON'T READ IF YOU DON'T LIKE! AND JUST SO YOU KNOW IT'S JUST A SUPER TEENY WEENY PART!)**

"Come over here Tobi. Let me see that cut." ordered Madara to his little twin brother.

"O-o-k..." mumbled a crying Tobi.

Madara then took his little brother's hand and kissed the cut on his finger better. "You really should be more careful little brother. Who would've known what would've happened if you have gotten cut by something sharper." Madara scolded still holding Tobi's hand while a baby pink background with glittery light in it surrounded them.

"I-I'm sorry big brother... T-t-tobi will be more careful next time..." Tobi sniffed.

"It's fine... just promise me that you won't hurt yourself like that again. You scared me, how you americans say, shitless." replied Madara in a caring voice while lightly gripping one of Tobi's shoulder.

"Ok big brother. Oh, and Tobi forgot to ask, where are the other members? Saku-chan wants to meet them!" said Tobi ruining the whole brotherly love effect in the background.

"Wait right here Tobi. You have just gotten badly injured. You shouldn't be walking around too much. I'll go find them for you as your big brother." said Madara hastily as he walked away.

Tobi just kept crying that his big brother abandoned him while Madara searched for the members for his beloved twin brother. They both just completely forgot about the now scarred for life Deidara who has just witnessed Tobi and Madara's brotherly love.

**(Author's Note: THEY ARE NOT GAY! THEY JUST HAVE A SPECIAL BROTHERLY BOND LIKE THE TWINS FROM OURAN HIGH SCHOOL HOST CLUB.)**

Deidara awkwardly crawled away from the scene to go find his Sasori-danna so they could go find Saku-chan together.

**Where Saku-chan Is**

Sakura was just enjoying a pack of delicious Skittles when a pair of strong arms grabbed her from behind.

"Ummm... excuse me sir, but can you let go of me please." asked Sakura politely all because of her Skittles.

"**BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF THIS PERVERTED BASTARD!" **yelled a pissed off Inner inside Sakura's head.

"Shut up Inner. I'm sure this can be solved peacefully." Sakura replied mentally.

"Now sir, if you would be so kind as to let go I'll just leave you with a warning." said Sakura calmly to the stranger.

"Why would I let go of you Saku-chan? Most importantly, why would you want me to let go of you Saku-chan?" asked a husky voice.

"Itachi? What are you doing here?" asked a confused Sakura.

"I'll be anywhere if you're there." replied Itachi.

Sakura was mentally panicking since the effects of the skittles was slowly wearing off and the second Inner took control Itachi would be dead in a split second.

5...

4...

3...

2...

1...!

"**CHAA!" **yelled Sakura breaking out of Itachi's grip.

"**WHAT THE HELL IS UP WITH YOUR FUCKING RHYMING!? ARE YOU RELATED TO DR. SUESS OR SOMETHING!? AND WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?! WHAT KIND OF PERSON COMES UP TO SOMEONE THEY BARELY FUCKING KNOW AND HUGS THEM?!" **screamed Inner Sakura taking control of her body.

"Why Saku-chan I'm hurt. Why would you blurt something like that without a curt nod of guilt?" asked a smirking Itachi.

"**WHY DON'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE ITACHI! YOU'RE ANNOYING AS HELL!" **yelled Inner.

"If you wish Sakura my dear. I always love my women feisty. Just remember, you're the one I love with all my might, the one I'll be thinking of tonight, the one that helps me make things right, the one I long to kiss good-night, and the one I'm not giving up without putting up a fight." Itachi rhymed as he walked away.

"**FUCK YOU AND YOUR RHYMING POWERS!" **screeched Inner before returning back into Sakura's head.

"Gosh Inner, that hurt like hell...." complained a dizzy Sakura with a head ache.

**Where Tobi-kun Is At ( School Hallway)**

Tobi was still bawling on the hallway floor waiting for his big brother to return with the other Akatsuki members. Suddenly, Madara came into sight with a whole wagon full of all the Akatuki members tied up with extra thick rope.

"Big brother! You came back for Tobi! And you've brought friends!" yelled Tobi happily.

"Yes, Tobi. I brought all the Akatsuki members right here. Now, where is that Saku-chan you wanted us to meet?" asked Madara kindly.

"Right this way!" yelled Tobi motioning them to follow him.

**Where Saku-chan Is At**

Sakura was really getting bored, and fast! She was so bored that she thought about commiting suicide just for the heck of it! Suddenly, she spotted Tobi and a person right next to him who was pulling along a red wagon full of people who were all tied up.

"Tobi-kun! What took you so long?" she asked after swallowing the last pieces of her skittles.

"Well, you see Saku-chan, Tobi tripped over a watermelon cart and then fell on Deidara-sempai and then got cut and then Tobi's big brother helped Tobi and then Tobi's big brother found other members for Tobi and then we're all here!" Tobi said super quick.

"That's amazing Tobi! Now, who are those people in the wagon?" asked Sakura curiously.

"Oh, those are the other Akatsuki members! Let me introduce you!" said Tobi excitedly.

"OK!" said Sakura happily.

"The guy with the green hair is Zetsu-sempai! The guy with the piercings is Pein-san! The girl with the blue hair is Pein's girlfriend, Konan-san! The guy over there is with the stitches is Kakuzu-san! And you already know Deidara-sempai, Hidan-san, Itachi-san, Kisame-san, and Tobi!" told Tobi.

"What about him?" asked Sakura pointing to Madara.

"Oh, he's Tobi's big brother, Madara! We're twins!" answered Tobi.

"It's a pleasure to finally meet you Saku-chan. My little brother has told me many great things about you." Madara smiled as he gently kissed her hand which caused everyone but Tobi, Konan **( since she's** **not gay ) **and Pein **( for now at least )** to fume with anger.

"It's nice to meet you too, I guess..." said Sakura a bit awkwardly.

"**He may not be as cute as Tobi but you've got to admit he's SEXY with that hot british accent!" **said Inner Sakura inside Sakura's head.

"You're right about that!" replied Sakura to her Inner.

"Well, I have to get home now! Bye Tobi!" yelled Sakura as she ran off.

"Tobi?" asked Madara.

"Yes big brother?" asked Tobi

"When did you have such great taste in women?" Madara replied.

**Me: LOVE ME 'CAUSE I MADE THIS CHAPTER LONGER THAN USUAL!**

**Hidan: HEY! I DIDN'T EVEN SAY ONE FUCKING WORD THE WHOLE FUCKING TIME!**

**Me: Well I didn't have any use of you for this chapter.**

**Hidan: Fuck you!**

**Me: Whatever you douchbag!**

**Hidan: Just get this fucking author's note over with already!**

**Me: FINE! JUST THREATEN THE FUCKING REVIEWERS ALREADY!**

**Hidan: FINE BITCH! REVIEW OR I WILL PULL OUT YOUR THROAT AND MAKE YOU EAT IT!**

**Me: Ummm.... Hidan, how are they gonna eat their throat if they don't have a throat to swallow it with?**

**Hidan: STUPID LOGIC! I DON'T GIVE A DAM HOW THEY EAT IT!**

**Me: God, you've got problems... Everyone, say good-bye!**

**Whole Cast: Good-bye! See you all next time!**

**Me: Don't forget to vote for a pairing on my profile poll!**


	8. The Author has something to say

**Me: I'm so sorry but my laptop broke down and i wont be able to post chapters for a while! I'm just using my parents' computer right now and it doesn't have OpenOffice soo yeah... I'm writing in word pad right now. I don't know when my laptop will be fixed but right now this story is on hold. SORRY TO ALL MY LOVING REVIWERS! I SWEAR THAT THE MOMENT I GET MY LAPTOP FIXED I'LL POST 3 CHAPTERS IN ****ONE**** WEEK! THATS A PROMISE! NOW BYE-BYE FOR NOW AND WAIT FOR MY NEXT UPDATE!**

**TobiIsSoBadAss**


	9. The REAL chapter 8!

**Me: I'm BACK!**

**Hidan: Is that supposed to be a good fucking thing?**

**Me: Of course! I'm sorry for the wait everyone! Don't worry, I'll keep my promise of updating 3 chapters this week!**

**Hidan: You're not going to say any more shit?**

**Me: Well I got a review saying that my author's note is sometimes longer than the story, and I think she's right!**

**Hidan: THANK JASHIN! THE BITCH IS DONE WITH HER FUCKING RANTS!**

**Me: SHUT THE FUCK UP HIDAN! Tobi, do the disclaimer.**

**Tobi: Hai! TobiIsSoBadAss does not own Naruto because if she did she would make Sasuke a gay bastard and turn Orochimaru sexy! ( KIDDING! XP )**

**Me: And Hidan is in the lead in my poll right now.**

**Hidan: Fuck yeah! This day just keeps getting fucking better and better! * a grand piano falls on him * Never fucking mind...**

**Me: Now on with my life saving master piece!**

_Skittles Make Love Happen~ Skittles Make Love Happen~ Skittles Make Love Happen~ Skittles Make Love Happen~Skittles Make Love Happen~_

**SKITTLES MAKE LOVE HAPPEN**

**Chapter 8**

**At Sakura's Condo**

"I'm back Yuuki-kun!" Sakura said as an orange Shiba Inu started jumping on her.

'I smell men! Where were you Saku-chan! I'll bite the ass of anyone that touched you!' Yuuki thought and barked.

"I'm sorry Yuuki-kun, but I can't take you out right now. It's too late... I'm just gonna go sleep..." Sakura started before she fell face flat on the floor.

Yuuki just sweat dropped at his master's stupidity.

' At least she didn't land on me like the last time...' Yuuki thought and shivered at the memory.

**The Next Morning**

Sakura was just busy dreaming of whatever people with pink hair dream of when suddenly...

"HELLO JAPAN! WHAT A YOUTHFUL DAY WE'RE HAVING! LET'S HAVE A COUNT DOWN TO START THE DAY OFF! 10! 9! 8! 7! 6! 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! BRINGGG! NOW WAKE UP YOU LAZYASSES!," shouted the radio man.

And to Yuuki's surprise, his master was still asleep.

Suddenly, a few miles away, a small fly landed on the ground, making a soft thud.

"AHHHH!" Sakura shot up hearing the noise.

"I'm gonna be fucking late! Dam!" Sakura yelled as she quickly got off her condo floor and ran to her room.

When she was all finished she gave Yuuki a quick pat on the head, then ran quickly to school.

**At School**

"Where the fuck is she!" complained a whiny Hidan.

"How the fuck should I know?" replied an irritated Kakuzu. " You were the one who told us the time she came to school... stalker..." he continued.

"I HEARD THAT YOU BASTARD! I'M NOT A FUCKING STALKER! I'M JUST _WATCHING _OVER HER! NOT STALKING, _WATCHING!_" retorted an angry Hidan.

"Look! I see her coming this way!" exclaimed Sasori.

Suddenly, the school bell rang, signaling the beginning of homeroom.

"Dam it, yeah! I'm sorry, but I won't let this ruin my perfect attendance record, yeah!" Deidara said running off.

"You're such a goody-two-shoes Deidara!" yelled his buddy Sasori.

"What are you guys doing here?" Sakura asked as she quickly came to a halt.

"Waiting for you darling," said Madara, snaking his arms around her waist.

"Right..." Sakura said awkwardly.

**'Remember when Hidan used to do that to us and accuse us of cheating whenever we're late?' **Inner Sakura asked mentally.

'Good times... Good times... But that was a long time ago...' Sakura replied to her Inner.

" Where were you Saku-chan! Tobi was so worried!" Tobi shrieked.

"Look guys, I gotta get going. I don't wanna be late for homeroom with Kakashi-sensai." Sakura said awkwardly.

"Of course Saku-chan! Be free! Go on without us! Just make sure you never forget me!" cried Madara dramatically as he let go of her.

"Sure! Why not!" Sakura replied as she ran off into the school.

"That wasn't supposed to happen..." Madara said sadly.

"Then what _was_ supposed to happen?" asked an annoyed Itachi who fell asleep on the street while waiting for Sakura.

"Looks like the fucking hobo finally woke up!" Hidan yelled and snorted in laughter.

"Hn. Back to my question." Itachi replied calmly.

"She was supposed to be touched by my willingness to let her go and stay with me so that we may have hot, rough sex and have her bear me many beautiful children for us to name Madara Jr. and Madonna!" Madara said happily. 

"Hn. You're a freak." Itachi announced.

"We already know..." Sasori replied.

**In Class**

Sakura was just a foot away from her class door and decided to take the cool entrance and _tried _to break the door down with her super kick and somersault her way to her desk while the class cheered for her, but _someone _ended up opening the door for her and the teacher just happened to be in front of her.

"I'm so sorry Kakashi-sensai! You should really be careful where you stand at!" Sakura scolded.

"Yes... Well, take your seat Sakura-san... I see that you're late... Looks like you've got detention!" Kakashi cried happily as he got up from the grouind and dusted himself off.

"What the fuck sensai! You never give detention for just being late! You fucking pedophile!" yelled an enraged Sakura.

"Sakura, how exactly does giving you detention for being late make me a pedophile?" Kakashi asked.

"I DON'T KNOW! BUT IT'S A VERY OFFENSIVE INSULT SO I ORDER YOU TO FEEL OFFENDED!" Sakura yelled loudly, causing a huge scene.

"It is very offending, being called a pedophile." Kakashi replied calmly.

"NOW IT HAS ACHIEVED IT'S PURPOSE!"Sakura cried triumphantly.

"You still have detention..." Kakashi reminded her.

"FUCK YOU!" Sakura roared as she stomped off to her desk.

"Every woman wants to. Wait in line." Kakashi replied in a cool way that practically screamed WOMANIZER!

"I DIDN'T MEAN IT THAT WAY YOU PERVERT!" Sakura angrily yelled.

**(Author's Note: Dam! I'm using yelled a lot in this chapter! Just wanted to point it out... Well... BACK TO THE STORY!)**

"I'm sure you didn't Sakura., I'm sure you didn't..." Kakashi said not convinced at all.

"Whatever!" Sakura yelled.

Suddenly, the bell rang which signaled the beginning of lunch.

"Remember Sakura, be here after school for detention." Kakashi reminded her so she wouldn't 'accidently' forget.

"Whatever Sensai! See you later!" Sakura yelled back to him as she walked off.

**Me: I'm so sorry for taking so fucking long to update! I've been busy with shit and all!  
**

**Hidan: Yeah? What kind of fucking shit?**

**Me: Well... First I went to my friend Trisha's birthday, Angela's birthday, Liams's birthday, Gary's birthday, Steffanie's birthday, John's birthday, Jeromes's birthday, Jacob's birthday, Tina's birthday, Megan's birthday, Kim's birthday, Riel's senior graduation, Andy's promotion ceremony, my baby cousin's baptism, my parent's wedding anniversary (I visit their grave), and watched the Ouran High School Host Club series. Then I-**

**Hidan: SHUT THE FUCK UP WOMAN! HOW MANY FUCKING BIRTHDAYS DID YOU VISIT!**

**Me: Not sure, but I've got A LOT of friends who's birthday is in Summer!**

**Hidan: Dam girl!**

**Me: Anyways... Hidan, threaten the reviewers!**

**Hidan: Review or I will clip your fingernails and use the pieces to poke your fucking eye out!**

**Me: That sounds wonderful! Bow time to say Good-bye!**

**Whole Cast: Good-bye everyone! See you all next time!**

**(Note: I promise to keep my promise!) **


End file.
